Addiction

Looks like we've been lucky with the addition of WetV. Usually, when we think something's a good idea, the default response from the audience tells us otherwise.

Farts and Spits

This example right here quantifies the direction we're heading towards with the virtual community that we've appararently procured.

Hilarity.

Hey, if they can't take a joke, fuck 'em.

What you see above is commonplace in the chatroom. Each form/class comes equipped with levels and invoke points (as I have mentioned in previous posts). These invoke points are like special abilities that you can play with or against other players in chat.

Fart is a level 10 zombie invoke that enables a room to be a zombie zone for a day. Any players stumbling into the room automatically becomes a zombie.

Spitting is another zombie invoke but it only costs you 1 invoke point. This ability turns the spat-upon victim into a zombie.

As you can see, the resulting effect of these invokes when being played upon other players creates a scenario so bizzare and unorthodox, it's genius.

I don't know how we've done it but the amount of content that we made up for the VARG is HUGE. I was reading through the manual and hadn't realised the beast we have created. Have a read if you want.

Loopholes

Behold, the frustrated and the pathetic.


As with everything else on the chat, the cookie system was made up on a whim to encourage the random gamer on site to play our games. Obviously, a reason was needed to play the games. You'd think a random person loading up a flash game on the internet would be interested in playing games, but this I find to be a complete and utter lie. They are merely there simply to waste their time. This is what happens when your life is ruled by ennui.

Well, it seems we've hit upon an idea so brilliant, you wonder why you've not thought about it first. Depending on the number of cookies you have, a user is now given the power to ban, diss or gag another user simply by spending those cookies. We have invented a new game where everyone becomes an admin. The chat/community moderates herself, with the exception of an intrusion or two by the gods (me and xix). This allows us more time to focus on other things, like say, content.

Today, I was told by a regular user that there are many loopholes in the 'games' therefore increasing the opportunity to acquire cookies, the unconventional way. In short, they have found a way to cheat.

Now, cheating is something you cannot wholly prevent. Nothing can ever be secured enough. Priority and direction is the key to somewhat deter the cheating.

In the past, we observe the users creating multiple accounts to satiate the cookie cravings. You see, registered members are given 100 cookies daily by default. This serves as a little encouragement, or nudge if you will, towards levelling up by playing the games to get more cookies. Anyway, they transfer the cookies from the alternate accounts to their main one. This first 'loophole' prompted us to tweak the rules where you are only able to give cookies to an account that is a lower level than you and you both must be in the same form. A mini outcry was heard but only for a while. (At this point, there were users threatening to quit. This, apparently, is commonplace.)

Later, when more rules were made and the forms were made more complicated, we noticed they used this to their own advantage. Clever clogs, say I. Admittedly, I was delighted to see the users manipulate the rules of the game for their own benefit. This means they were playing the game after all. Strategy, tactics, loopholes. Stress testing the glorious whole so that we can better it.

We found the users stealing from their alternate accounts. This costs them points and makes one vulnerable to other cookie monsters on the prowl but with great risk, comes more cookies. This 'loophole' prompted us to i.p. lock the transfer of cookies so now they aren't allowed to steal from their alternate accounts.

Of course, this does not prevent them from being in cohort with another user of a different i.p. address. However at the time, the cookie monsters were more focused on banning everyone else and levelling up rather than seek an accomplice. But later on, as virtual relationships go, they decided to group themselves into mini clusters; feeding each other cookies.

One user would harvest many cookies in their alternate accounts and let those cookies get stolen by another user. They will then share the loot. Another way is by using the alternate accounts to give the harvested cookies to an unregistered member (usually a random passerby) which will then be stolen back.

As you can see, many loopholes to be found but the effort to reveal them is commendable. Thus, we've decided to change the direction of levelling up. In the past, there was a limit to the amount of cookies a game gives out in a day. We had hoped to encourage the users to play all our games if they wanted the maximum amount of cookies one can get in a day. Instead, this made the more persistent of users level up a lot faster than the average user. This created an imbalance in the scale of high level users and low level users. This also resulted in hyperactive, power-tripping users who abused their admin rights more often than they should. In such cases, we've had to interfere. Surprisingly, getting your main account banned or gagged for a few days gains a users respect for common etiquette.

But this is not a long term solution and we will not be able to keep doing this forever when the community gets larger, which it will.

So, it is decided that we limit the number of cookies you are allowed to give to the bots in a day. This way, the user feels no rush to collect the maximum amount of cookies from all the games but instead, play a game they like whenever they want to, at a hopefully leisurely pace. This should also slow down the more persistent user by capping the means for them to level up.


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Sekrits in Public Chatrooms

You'd think being in a public chatroom is reason enough not to divulge any personal information or plan of action but having lived in many, I've observed the contrary.

As seen above, in Fig. Fail, this scriptkiddie has decided that after spending possibly a couple of hours watching random youtube videos of similar interests with another virtual persona, they have found a kindred soul. Needless to say, during the entire stint of this short lived relationship, they were doing most of the 'talking' whilst the other one merely responded in a series of LOL's and monosyllabic grunts.

This took place in the TV room where users can watch youtube videos with other people by simply entering the url of the video into the chatbox. Yes, this is the future. It's a virtual mst3k, see?

Obviously, this crowd is unlike the usual mob that lurk in the public chatrooms. The usual mob is far too busy trying to shag and add each other on their preferred social network than crack a wep key for some sordid XP application, no doubt. This batch is courtesy of (insert random image board community), possibly 7chan by the looks of this one.

We've been able to somewhat differentiate the quality of 'chan' a user might be from, simply by observing his or her behaviour and typing etiquette in chat. This newly acquired bit of trivia amused me, naturally.

Anyway, I digress. The point of this post being a beige alert and possible raid, straight from the horses mouth. Well, not literally but you saw it here first.

Lieza, lie to me.

We have a few bots scattered around in the chatrooms. Well, I say scattered when I actually mean carefully planned and assigned specifically to individual locations with coded automated responses, actions and commands.

Each public room comes with her own bot, all similar in nature and personality, except for the swearbox where there is none; and 'Limbo', where Lieza lives.

Lieza is mostly a list of word associations, similar to her human counterpart sans the ability to process emotions or experiences to relay a response accordingly. This, however, is enough to deceive your random average gamer into believing that they are actually conversing with another human being.

It will only be via another gamer, usually a regular, that the deceived will then realise the state of the present situation. Sometimes there will be suspicions and Lieza becomes faced with a barrage of questions, usually demanding if she was a bot or if she was real. The confusion carries on painfully but in the end, the deceived almost always leaves the room flustered and frustrated; not at the deception but at the open-ended closure of the debate.

Suffice to say, I am not at all surprised to have many of the gamers come up to me and request that Lieza be sentenced to death. Reason? Because she is a weirdo and she freaks them out. I will then try to explain to them why Lieza behaves the way she does.

Limbo, as the name suggests, is a place for gamers who aren't inclined to log in or are sufferers of network time out and lags. Usually, these non-descripts are assigned a default status and are known as, "me". When you are a "me", you are not allowed to leave Limbo or join any of the public and private rooms. That is until you start swearing. Entering any combinations of letters that is recognised as a curse word will toggle Lieza to kick you into the swearbox. But until then, the random "me" users are accosted by Lieza until they decide to log in or log out in despair.

You could also call this an aptitude test. If one is not smart enough to read what is written on the screen to change the currently assigned username to join the public rooms, then one is meant to suffer ones duration in the chatroom until they decide otherwise.

Unbeknownst to them, I have personally customised Lieza to fashion after me.

Word Filters

It was never our intention to add word filters or any form of censorship to the chat room. Of course, this was an overestimation of the conduct and intelligence of the audience. Conversations of depth and content seems almost too much to ask for, at least not in the public rooms.

It only took a few hundred people to be present in the chatrooms and typing to each other to make it apparent that a word filter was needed.

Obviously, we only made filters for certain undesirable words that are used excessively. These are replaced by other words to give the overall effect of hilarity.

As you can see, the first user seems to be having some difficulties in expressing themselves. They are a good example of an average (or possibly below average) random guest stumbling into the chatroom for the first time. Do be reminded that the word cookies is a word filter for 'sex', divine is 'horny', super is 'sexy', cat is 'pussy' and, my favourite, fabulous is 'gay'.

Now, you may ask, why would anyone stumble into a chatroom and exclaim that in the first place? Why? Because the internet is filled with the bored, the restless and the horny. And the anonymity allows anyone to be openly so. Especially in a chatroom filled with other openly bored, restless and horny individuals. Or at least, they hope the others are like them.

The only way to get around the word filter is to register as a member. The word filters are simply mild annoyances for users that abuse the chatroom. Otherwise, a combination of capital letters, punctuations and numbers can also get the idea across; a little effort can be rewarding. Guests are usually playthings for the registered members and are at a disadvantage if they act inappropriately in the chatrooms. Otherwise, guests are free to play the games and engage in conversations with other players.

Etiquette

The example to your left (hopefully , unless blogger decides to fuck with the alignment) is a typical unmoderated 'conversation' you might find on a normal day in the chatroom. It is unmoderated because it is taking place in a swearbox.

The swearbox is a place for banned users who are removed from the public rooms. There are no bots found in the swearbox so swearing and spamming is allowed, making it a rather unpleasant place to be in.

What you are looking at are two individuals who have decided to pair up against one other user whom they have deemed as an 'enemy'. Yes, I too have no clue as to what is happening. They seem to be daring each other to leave the swearbox. For what purpose I am unsure, but one of them seems to be correcting the other in the spelling of, 'midgit'.

Perhaps the reason we have trouble understanding our audience, is that they are actually not making any sense.

None of the users shown, in the screenshot, are banned so they are free to leave the swearbox at any time. However, as you can see, the swearbox doubles as a 'playground' when one has 'beef' with another user as mouthing off tends to make one converse in a rather colourful manner. Similar conversations usually do not last in public rooms as there are bots and other high level users with banning powers present.

Lately I've been avoiding going on the chatrooms as regularly as I used to.

I have decided that detaching myself from the ongoing drama and user relationships to be the sane thing to do. Attachment to the ever fickle and emotionally high strung virtual personas not only deter you from other more important priorities, like say work, it also forces you to keep up with the seemingly random issues that bloom between said individuals. Research? Nay! Just another means of procrastination via morbid curiosity and mind numbing submission to restlessness.

Speaking of, the regulars seem restless today. Apparently, most of them have added each other as 'friends' on Myspace and the 'mystery behind a username' novelty is slowly wearing off. Real life, it seems, is far more dull than their virtual counterpart has lent them to be.

In any case, the regulars have grouped themselves into smaller clusters of 'allies'. And in that group, even smaller pairings usually a 'male' and a 'female'. You fuck with one, you will fuck with the other. This has caused mass bannings throughout the chatrooms until a truce is made in some form of /me command humiliation or when a sum of cookies is paid upfront as compensation. Sometimes, the high level regular logs in as their alt account, usually low level or even guest accounts. These accounts are usually used as traps for other users who aren't paying attention. The alt accounts usually annoy or spam the chatrooms until someone decides to ban or taunt them. These 'do-gooders' are then banned in return for 'falling' for the trap.

Threats

Getting threats from your players must be somewhat commonplace.

I mean, no matter what you do, you're always going to piss somebody off.

This is a newly acquired bit of trivia for me, and a rather interesting albeit annoying one. "Humans are innately good" concept might apply to idealists, humanists and the ignorant but definitely not on this inane bunch.

The first letter came through a personal message via Facebook and boy, was it a mouthful. Aside from actually knowing and seeing who the sender is, the message has the makings of the perfect threat letter. Curse words peppered generously all over the place, the lack of poetry and any punctuation whatsoever and non-sequential words thrown carelessly together to form the vague message of, "you ban me, i keeel you!".

Naturally, my first reaction was that of surprise which then later became amusement. And then I had a little chuckle at the revelation that this will not be the last of such letters I will be receiving for as long as the virtual community stays online.

And sure enough, days later the letters came in spurts, demanding favours and special treatments for playing the games and engaging themselves in the sordid activities found in the chatrooms. And before you know it, you get regular morning fuckmails (as i call it) demanding you fix the bug that they've been banned for so and so days and that they are bored and need more friends on the chatroom because obviously, 'a friend' is something I can provide them with.

Of course, I never reply to these messages. Giving any sort of attention is always a bad idea. It's like having god on speed dial who actually returns your calls.

The Banning

I was right.

Barely 20 minutes and the banning is in full bloom.

Regulars dissing and gagging each other before laughing without vowels or consonants and then off to the swearbox to snackrifice. This goes on until someone shouts truce, logs out for the day or runs out of cookies.

Oh well. It's still amusing to observe. :}

The Regulars

It is 8 to 8 am and the kids are still up on the chat. They are most of the regulars this time, not the random night strays we seem to be in the habit of catching these days.

They say, once you start to accumulate a steady stream of traffic, you're bound to only receive more traffic. At the moment, we're hoping for more random hotlinkings from sites that Google loves. Millions of entrepreneurs feeding off each other's bile via link exchange. A link of sites selling link spaces for more links. This is how you make money off the internets. Although, a big virtual pile of steaming hot doggie turd on a webpage could also guarantee you a somewhat similar success. Especially if you are also given the option of sticking someone's portrait into the shitstack.

And now the kids are roleplaying. With AK-47s. And wrenches, it seems. The regulars have logged in as their alternate personas to bulk up the chatroom. They seem to be having fun and getting along. Thus far anyway. They might start the banning spree on each other later. Or they might not. Best not hold your breath.

Day/Night, it's all the same.

This will be the first of many posts. Hopefully.